Lifeboard and Seeds of Pearl

So, first off, I hope everyone is having a fabulous Saturday. In spite of the (continuous) rainy weather here, I am having a nice day. Spent some time with a friend and her mama scouring a local nursery for fairy garden accessories. I did not leave with any FG stuff, but I did end up with an awesome succulent called Seeds of Pearl (pictured below).

Apparently, the little seeds are roots, and you can just plant them, and they'll grow! Super excited--we'll see if I manage not to kill it.

I'd like to share one of the other personal projects I am working on called a Lifeboard (a term I made up). It's kind of like a cross between a to-do list, a bucket list, and a wanna list. In the past couple of years, I have faced tough personal choices and professional challenges, so I'm looking to explore what I am passionate about. What I love is that the list can be anything!

Creating the lifeboard reminds me a little bit of when I was a teen-ager. I would cut pictures out of my Mom's Spiegel catalog. (For the woman who has everything but time.) And I would dream about my life. I was 24 and living in Manhattan. I was studying in Paris. I was a university professor cultivating and shaping minds. I was a model. I was an actress. I was only limited to my imagination.

Part of this is the joy (and luxury) of being young. To be unencumbered by adult responsibilities. To be able to dream with a focused single-mindedness.

To some degree, I never grew out of this. I was/am always trying new things or pursuing a new hobby.

My mom was always such an advocate of things I would try. A conversation with her would often go something like this:

Mom: What's going on, sweetie?

Me: I'm auditioning for a play since I just moved here and don't know anyone.

Mom: Good for you!!

Or:

Mom: What's going on, sweetie?

Me: Going back to teaching part-time. Adjuncting.

Mom: What class?

Me: Developmental writing.

Mom: You get your English skills from me. Sentence diagramming was my favorite thing, and I was the best in the class.

(And she was, too.)

Most hobbies met with her approval: yoga (good exercise!!), bellydancing (cute outfits!), volunteer work at the hospital (find a doctor!), salsa (you're just like your grandmother!).

Others met with a distinct lack of enthusiasm.

Mom: Sweetheart, I do not like this martial arts thing you're doing. It sounds dangerous.

Me: It's not dangerous. It's fine. (I neglected to mention that one time I got into an armlock and tore cartilage/)

Mom: Do you have to wear those pajamas?

Me: Mom, it's called a gi. And yes I do.

Mom: And you have to roll around with boys?

Me: Yep.

Mom: I'm not sure that is lady-like behavior.

And:

Mom: Skiing? You went skiing!!

Me: Yeah. In Utah!!

(I neglected to mention falling off the chairlift--need-to-know basis.)

Mom: Can't you pick a safer hobby?

Me: Like popping bubble wrap?

Mom: Exactly!! You know, other moms have daughters who have SAFE hobbies. And you ski...and want to jump out of an airplane.

Me: I told you I wasn't going to do that anymore.

Mom. Promise?

Me: I promise.

Mom: I'm glad you try new things. But make sure you wear a helmet. I worry.

(I have since retired my skiing career. The world rejoices.)

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I had often wondered if me dallying in multiple things made me flighty.

In May of 2006, my Mom flew down from Minnesota because I needed her. I missed her.

One night, we were sitting outside on my balcony. I distinctly remember this conversation.

Me: I've been sending out resume.

Mom: Okay.

Me: I think I want to leave Texas.

Mom: Okay.

Me: I've been sending out resumes to Chicago and Minnesota. But also to Redmond.

Mom: Microsoft?

Me: Yeah.

Mom: They would be lucky to have you.

(Moms rock.)

Me: But I really want to be close to you.

Me: I have a question.

Mom: Okay.

Me: Do you think it's okay that I do different things? Apply to jobs in different places?

Mom: I do.

Me: Does it make me seem flighty or...dilletantish?

Mom: No, it doesn't. It makes you adventurous. I admire you for that. You never let anything hold you back. And how can you know what you like if you don't try new things?

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After Mom died, some of the spark left me. It took me a bit to find my ground. Where was I going?

Apparently, my spirit didn't stray too far since I now paint, make soap and bath salts, and tried my hand at jewelry-making. (As with my botched singing lesson, I'm glad I have people for this. :) )

And now without further ado: my Lifeboard (thus far)!! (I know my mom would so do this with me.) 

My Lifeboard

1. Go to my family's bar on Lake Michigan.

2. Buy a Chanel handbag for my 40th.

3. I like to help people.

4. I like to teach.

5. I like to learn.

6. I like pretty things.

7. I like Neiman's.

8. Go to Georgia and visit Grandma.

9. Go to Vermont. (I have no idea why.)

10. Learn how to paint with oils.

11. Grow a sunflower plant.

12. Learn how to walk in high heels.

13. Get a facial.

14. Work with a literacy organization or teach ESL. (Which I have already done.)

15. Write (something)

16. Just up and drive some place. Even I don't know where I'm going.

17. Go to Italy and Greece.

18. Feel fulfilled.

19. Get organized and donate stuff to Goodwill. (A boring list item.)

20. MAYBE get a tattoo. (Maybe)

What's on your list?

Don't stop dreaming!

xo,

B